Problem or Solution: Where is your focus?
Today I am grateful for taste buds to savor the foods I am choosing to eat mindfully. I am also grateful for some quality family conversation together yesterday between Sam, Darcy, and I.
A common theme you will hear among people recovering from alcoholism and other addictions is "focus on the solution, not the problem." It's a good thought for anyone to consider and then actively apply. Continuing to give energy to a problem tends to only exacerbate it. But putting that energy toward a solution tends to help a person feel better and get better results. It has even been proven in my life and recovery as well that this holds true -- "focus on the solution and the problem goes away."
For example: Maybe the way my husband did a household chore has me a little rankled, being the controlling sort I am. Not a serious problem, for sure, but it becomes a bigger problem if I keep thinking about it and get more frustrated. Then I become ungrateful to my husband and I start critiquing all the household chores he is doing. What happens next usually involves my mouth and poor choices in what I verbalize. It may not be a hostile environment I create, but it is sure not a friendly one either.
If I give my focus to the solution instead, I accept that my husband's way of doing things may not be my way but that doesn't make it wrong. (Oversized ego anyone?) And I remain grateful that he is doing the chore, saving me time for other things, or allowing us more time together to relax. There is no problem, just acceptance and gratitude.
Here is another example of a more serious nature. Fear of cancer returning in me or someone I care about could become a paralyzing fear if I fed it. My magnifying mind would amplify the fear and every thought would become one of "who will it happen to, when, and will it kill them?" I would become hypervigilant, fearful of everything I do and ingest, and the joy would be squeezed right out of life. The solution to such fear is to have faith, and to stay present in this day and enjoy it. Cancer or no cancer, none of us is guaranteed our health or even tomorrow. Make the most of today, be grateful for the gift it is. Make healthy choices and take care of myself. That is the solution and the fear shrinks to a manageable size.
Solution or problem? Where will you focus your energy today?
A common theme you will hear among people recovering from alcoholism and other addictions is "focus on the solution, not the problem." It's a good thought for anyone to consider and then actively apply. Continuing to give energy to a problem tends to only exacerbate it. But putting that energy toward a solution tends to help a person feel better and get better results. It has even been proven in my life and recovery as well that this holds true -- "focus on the solution and the problem goes away."
For example: Maybe the way my husband did a household chore has me a little rankled, being the controlling sort I am. Not a serious problem, for sure, but it becomes a bigger problem if I keep thinking about it and get more frustrated. Then I become ungrateful to my husband and I start critiquing all the household chores he is doing. What happens next usually involves my mouth and poor choices in what I verbalize. It may not be a hostile environment I create, but it is sure not a friendly one either.
If I give my focus to the solution instead, I accept that my husband's way of doing things may not be my way but that doesn't make it wrong. (Oversized ego anyone?) And I remain grateful that he is doing the chore, saving me time for other things, or allowing us more time together to relax. There is no problem, just acceptance and gratitude.
Here is another example of a more serious nature. Fear of cancer returning in me or someone I care about could become a paralyzing fear if I fed it. My magnifying mind would amplify the fear and every thought would become one of "who will it happen to, when, and will it kill them?" I would become hypervigilant, fearful of everything I do and ingest, and the joy would be squeezed right out of life. The solution to such fear is to have faith, and to stay present in this day and enjoy it. Cancer or no cancer, none of us is guaranteed our health or even tomorrow. Make the most of today, be grateful for the gift it is. Make healthy choices and take care of myself. That is the solution and the fear shrinks to a manageable size.
Solution or problem? Where will you focus your energy today?
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