Turn an Annoyance into Gratitude
Today I am grateful for my family and what living with others teaches me about love and tolerance. I am also grateful for a house and belongings to share with my family.
So how does one turn an annoyance into gratitude? I can't guarantee this will always work, but when I remember to use this technique, I stop the annoyance train, jump off and head back to the gratitude train. It's one of those things that is simple, but not easy.
When someone in my family is doing something I find frustrating or annoying, my first instinct is to get self-righteously angry and tell them why they should do things my way, how my way makes more sense, is more efficient, whatever. In other words, my ego kicks in. But when I can hold in my first instinct, I allow my second instinct, gratitude, to kick in and defuse the annoyance.
Anyone in my family of origin or family currently living with me is well aware of my control issues. They surround household chores like laundry and dishes among other things. On a bad day, when I find myself annoyed by balled up socks in the laundry, I let my son know about it in a harsh tone (instinct #1). On a good day, I keep my mouth shut and think instead about how fortunate I am to have a son, that he is healthy, that we have a good relationship, that he is in my life (instinct #2). You get the idea. On a bad day, my husband will hear about it if he didn't load the dishwasher to my standards. On a good day, I am grateful my husband is loading the dishwasher, that we have a marriage, family, and home to share, that we love one another. You get the idea.
It works.It really does. And it is the little things that matter.
So how does one turn an annoyance into gratitude? I can't guarantee this will always work, but when I remember to use this technique, I stop the annoyance train, jump off and head back to the gratitude train. It's one of those things that is simple, but not easy.
When someone in my family is doing something I find frustrating or annoying, my first instinct is to get self-righteously angry and tell them why they should do things my way, how my way makes more sense, is more efficient, whatever. In other words, my ego kicks in. But when I can hold in my first instinct, I allow my second instinct, gratitude, to kick in and defuse the annoyance.
Anyone in my family of origin or family currently living with me is well aware of my control issues. They surround household chores like laundry and dishes among other things. On a bad day, when I find myself annoyed by balled up socks in the laundry, I let my son know about it in a harsh tone (instinct #1). On a good day, I keep my mouth shut and think instead about how fortunate I am to have a son, that he is healthy, that we have a good relationship, that he is in my life (instinct #2). You get the idea. On a bad day, my husband will hear about it if he didn't load the dishwasher to my standards. On a good day, I am grateful my husband is loading the dishwasher, that we have a marriage, family, and home to share, that we love one another. You get the idea.
It works.It really does. And it is the little things that matter.
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