Not Less of a Woman, Just a Woman Less Her Breasts
Today I am grateful for the Hastings Breast Cancer Support Group, my friends there, and the newcomer we supported last evening.
I hadn't been able to make it to support group for months. I am glad I went last evening. Like any support group, we are more there for the new person than we are for ourselves. To see someone newly diagnosed, awaiting chemotherapy and many unknowns, helps me keep things in perspective.
I hope we helped her.
It is hard for me to grasp that it has already been seven years since I had bilateral mastectomies. Seven years ago today. I woke up with breasts that morning and went to sleep without them that night. It is hard to describe what that felt like both physically and emotionally.
When I woke up from surgery that day I did something that was very important to my healing, grieving, and accepting. I took a look at my chest, my new flat terrain. I didn't avoid it, I faced it. That has made a big difference as I moved forward from December 17, 2008.
I had months to decide what I would ultimately do about my breasts, one which had cancer in it and one which didn't. It wasn't an easy decision, but I know I made the right one for me.
Seven years later, days go by that I don't even think about being breast-less. It remains a part of my healing and recovery though to continue to process the changing emotions that come. The intense ones don't visit much anymore, but I still remember the fear, the loss, the self-consciousness, the strange vacancy that I felt in those first days, weeks, and months.
Here is a link to a blog post from three years ago that shares some more of my emotional reflecting.
And I close with one of my own favorite original lines on the topic of being without breasts:
Life goes on and goes on with gratitude beyond measure. Grateful to be alive and living life fully. Grateful to be able-bodied and physically capable to do the activities I enjoy. Onward!
I hadn't been able to make it to support group for months. I am glad I went last evening. Like any support group, we are more there for the new person than we are for ourselves. To see someone newly diagnosed, awaiting chemotherapy and many unknowns, helps me keep things in perspective.
I hope we helped her.
It is hard for me to grasp that it has already been seven years since I had bilateral mastectomies. Seven years ago today. I woke up with breasts that morning and went to sleep without them that night. It is hard to describe what that felt like both physically and emotionally.
When I woke up from surgery that day I did something that was very important to my healing, grieving, and accepting. I took a look at my chest, my new flat terrain. I didn't avoid it, I faced it. That has made a big difference as I moved forward from December 17, 2008.
I had months to decide what I would ultimately do about my breasts, one which had cancer in it and one which didn't. It wasn't an easy decision, but I know I made the right one for me.
Seven years later, days go by that I don't even think about being breast-less. It remains a part of my healing and recovery though to continue to process the changing emotions that come. The intense ones don't visit much anymore, but I still remember the fear, the loss, the self-consciousness, the strange vacancy that I felt in those first days, weeks, and months.
Here is a link to a blog post from three years ago that shares some more of my emotional reflecting.
And I close with one of my own favorite original lines on the topic of being without breasts:
"I am not less of a woman, just a woman less her breasts."
Life goes on and goes on with gratitude beyond measure. Grateful to be alive and living life fully. Grateful to be able-bodied and physically capable to do the activities I enjoy. Onward!
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