Going Deeper

Today I am grateful for my hearing and my other senses. They are all in working order. I am also grateful for push-ups and sit-ups.

In ways it is good to be in the same place I was, as I blogged about on Monday. If I were at the same place in all areas of my life, however, I would be stagnant, complacent. I would not be growing and learning and I prefer to keep growing and learning as a person, as a unique individual, as my life unfolds.

That means going deeper. Deeper into my writing. Deeper into my relationships. Deeper into my faith. And it means work. Hard work. But as I say in my blog profile:

"A recovering alcoholic since 1989 and a breast cancer survivor since 2008, I work daily at recovery from both of these life challenges. But I also work daily at living life to the fullest. Gratitude is a significant part of that work. It is the best work I do, because the dividends are consistently positive. I am prone to self-pity and fear, so faith and gratitude are good antidotes. I firmly believe in the active practice of gratitude. It has worked for me for twenty years." 

Daily work helps me go deeper into joy and wonder. Deeper into different levels of energy and creativity. Deeper into gratefulness and mindfulness. The work is worth it.

Sadly, there is also the "going deeper" that is treacherous and drowns people. Deeper into addiction. Deeper into untreated mental illness. Deeper into financial difficulty. Deeper into an unhealthy relationship. Deeper into negative habits. Deeper into denial.

But I am thinking especially of the words of my sister Danita when she recently described her husband Roger as "going deeper into dementia." He's drowning and there's no lifeboat coming. Yet, my sister has several lifelines that are helping her through this dark and deep time in her life. And she can even find joy in days and moments, in interactions with her ill husband and others. That is truly diving deeper and then resurfacing. It seems the only way to survive such waters. I am grateful for the care Roger is receiving and I am grateful for Danita's human and non-human support system.

What does "going deeper" mean to you today?


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