A Sunny Disposition

Today I am grateful for sweat running down my face and the gift of physical mobility.

In our neck of the woods, we haven't seen the sun for days. It's been rainy and gray. We've seen some snow flakes and the wind was really strong earlier in the week. But I will take this. My heart goes out to tornado victims in several states and to places in Florida that had 20 inches of rain in less than 24 hours. It helps me keep perspective.

Still, the gloomy weather is wearing us down. Working in a school, the pent-up energy and the frustration from sports cancellations are palpable. We need some sunshine, and not just for the vitamin D. Is it possible to have a sunny disposition through all of this? Sure. But most of us can't muster it day after day. Maybe we can take turns to help each other through.

I wouldn't say I have a sunny disposition. Outgoing and vivacious don't seem to fit me. Energetic does though. I am not always smiling either, but I guess I smile more than frown on most days. Maybe that is a sunny disposition. Maybe it does rub off on those around me.

Maybe my outer disposition doesn't qualify as sunny, but when I think about it, my inner disposition does. A lot sunnier than it was in the first 25 years of my life. When I stopped hating myself and started getting help for my drinking problem, things got sunnier. When I started practicing gratitude on a regular basis, things got sunnier. My perception of self and surrounding world brightened. It continues to be bright when I stick to positive habits like exercise, gratitude practice, spiritual endeavors.

My face may not always reflect that sunny disposition, but my heart and soul do when I do the work I need to do.

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