Two Diseases That Kill

Today I am grateful for pizza and ice cream--my favorite comfort foods. I am also grateful for the sense of humor my husband and I bring to our marriage.

I am grateful to be a recovering alcoholic since 1989 and a cancer survivor since 2008.

It was work on recovery from alcoholism that first led me to gratitude journaling and the value in "practicing an attitude of gratitude." I could have died an alcoholic death at a young age; running my car into a tree or bridge abutment. And you wouldn't have known if it was suicide or drunkenness, because both were on my mind at those times. I have witnessed the destruction of lives that addiction causes. I have gone to wakes and funerals for fellow alcoholics who couldn't stay sober. Why do I get to be here?  God's grace.

I had years of gratitude practice when my breast cancer diagnosis came along. Already a firm believer that gratitude works and is always possible, that is how I approached the challenges of surgeries, chemotherapy, and a lost sense of security. A second disease that kills was taking a shot at me and gratitude was allowing me the strength and calm to proceed.

There is some fear I live with because a relapse of either of these could kill me. But I focus more on faith and daily living. I do what I can to protect myself. (Except I could cut out some unhealthy foods.) It's work, but today I feel worthy of that effort. That wasn't always the case.

I came closer to dying when I was drunk than I did during my cancer ordeal and I hope it stays that way. But having cancer has pushed me to a new level of gratitude and motivation to live life to the fullest. I am further humbled by the lessons of God's grace. Two diseases that kill and I am still full of life. I am deeply blessed. Deeply.

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