Still Flat, Still Running
Today I am grateful for electricity and a roof over our heads. I am grateful to be able-bodied and alive.
Yesterday's temperature was in the mid-50's and I ran outside in capris and a t-shirt for the first time in months. It felt great and freeing after a winter of many runs covered in many layers. But I also get reminded of my flatness and feel a little vulnerable.
I will never forget the first post-mastectomy run I took down the trail across the street from our house in the spring of 2009 on that first warm day, with just shorts and a t-shirt on. I felt quite vulnerable at the same time that I experienced the joy of running, the exhiliration of freedom and endorphins.
In the years since, I have become less self-conscious about my chest terrain when I go running. Running, in fact, was one of the key factors in my decision to not have reconstruction after my mastectomies. I wanted to give myself the best chances to keep running and and to do so comfortably. More surgeries and more scars may have meant complications or chronic pain. I wasn't willing to take that risk. It was the right decision for me.
So I am still flat when I choose to be, but more importantly I am still running. Most importantly, I am still here to welcome this new day with a sense of mindfulness and gratitude. Let's make it a good day for each other and ourselves.
Yesterday's temperature was in the mid-50's and I ran outside in capris and a t-shirt for the first time in months. It felt great and freeing after a winter of many runs covered in many layers. But I also get reminded of my flatness and feel a little vulnerable.
I will never forget the first post-mastectomy run I took down the trail across the street from our house in the spring of 2009 on that first warm day, with just shorts and a t-shirt on. I felt quite vulnerable at the same time that I experienced the joy of running, the exhiliration of freedom and endorphins.
In the years since, I have become less self-conscious about my chest terrain when I go running. Running, in fact, was one of the key factors in my decision to not have reconstruction after my mastectomies. I wanted to give myself the best chances to keep running and and to do so comfortably. More surgeries and more scars may have meant complications or chronic pain. I wasn't willing to take that risk. It was the right decision for me.
So I am still flat when I choose to be, but more importantly I am still running. Most importantly, I am still here to welcome this new day with a sense of mindfulness and gratitude. Let's make it a good day for each other and ourselves.
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